THE INFORMATION #786 MAY 30, 2014

THE INFORMATION
#786 MAY 30, 2014
Copyright 2014 FRANCIS DIMENNO
http://dimenno.gather.com
francisdimenno@yahoo.com
https://dimenno.wordpress.com

Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings.–Jane Austen

WHEN THIS WORLD CATCHES FIRE
BOOK THREE: SAVAGE NOXTOWN
CHAPTER NINE: PART TWELVE: THE MAYOR OF HELL

“Not to name too many names, then, old Son, but there at the shore
hall, at the mystic meeting on Lammas night, where Stolas called
together his spotty crew, immaculately dressed in a black suit that
might have been suitable for a parson, was one Whitney Dean Agares,
and his young son
Elsworth. Did good old Whitney had his fingers in every pie? Yes! He was
up to his fists in bloody deeds! Not for him the minor vices; no; he
had slum tenements in the heart of Noxtown where he would squeeze dry
the tenants and, rather than squander the money, would use it instead
to put up holdings in the near neighborhoods. He bought land next to
the mental asylum in Arcadia to the far north and used it to build
shoddy houses where he housed the families of indigents who had been
cast out of there without a cent, Out in the middle of nowhere, in
Wazooville, he bought a whole chain of deserted shops down by the
trolley stop on the corner and converted them into bars, pool rooms,
and news stands which he used as his headquarters to run numbers in
what used to be a quiet neighborhood. You can imagine how the town
fathers felt about that; but they were helpless.

He ran Wazooville as a wide open town and he drove out the old
Klutter family, who had had a little variety store there, and last I
heard, they had moved away to the far west just to get away from
there. You don’t mess with the Agares b’hoys. What he done in the
north west, in Sleepy Hollow, was even worse–he bought an old
printing press there and turns out all sorts of poisonous handbills
and broadsheets, too, for over-the-counter nostrums. Some say he done a little
counterfeiting as well. In King’s Plaza, in the south west,  he built
a cinema, where they show all sorts of disreputable motion pictures,
and over to Eden Prairie he bought a bunch of swamp lands for pennies
an acre and God knows what he has planned for those. You know that
whenever there is a horse race or a boxing match, good old Whitney has
a hand in it, somehow. He’s crazy clever–deals only with the high
muck-a-mucks at the Soho club–sometimes for thousands–is always
saying he is got a sure thing and sure enough, he can double your
money within a year, using ever wrong trick in the book, but mostly, I
think, through loan-sharking.”

“Speaking of slumlords, there was this Italian-looking fellow name of
Nehemiah Vassago–a big greasy guts with a spit-shine hairdo parted
clean in the middle–who bought him a bunch of worthless slag heaps in
the near north side and built a charity hospital, and a public school, and
a community college on the garbage dumps and he sold them to the city for
a pretty penny. They say that folks who are forced to live there
because they can’t afford better don’t tend to live too long, and I
can believe them. Have you ever BEEN to Westridge,
down by the Salt River? It looks like all the sad old
skippers and garbage scow cap’ns have washed ashore
there and left their hulks to rot in the perpetual filth. He also
built a walled housing development high on a hill where he plans to
build a rich man’s resort. No one ever got fat pitchin’ fast balls
past Vassago–from the looks of it. Sanctus Itorius res, call the rest.
Here the mother of God came to his assistance, reaching
out her snow-white hand, against the hot and cold brand.”

“The Irish was represented by ‘Gashouse’ Bathin who was also there
down to the docks at the big Lammas meeting–a ward-heeler of the old
school, along with his own little son, Zeke, also known as ‘Bathless’ Bathin
because of his extreme hatred of the water. Old Gashouse didn’t mince
words–said he was in the game of politics to win the lot, and, as
the long-time big-wig of Gleason’s Corners, with over 60 bars for
1,200 people, of which he ownded about half, he had himself a right
little satrapy. No need for a church, says he, though he did relent
and allow the Roman Catholics to build a chapel right on the outskirts
of his neighborhood.”

“The Jews had their own vice lord, Hillel Labolas, a mild-looking old
gent who had a wife named Lottie who gave birth to a giant baby, also
known as Lottie. He had a pickle-nosed old face full of wrinkles that
only a mother could love, and though totally blameless and devout to
surface appearances. he was head of a mysterious entity called ‘The
Outfit’ as controlled the numbers game in every candy store for miles
around, and still does. He has a perfect memory and can do figures in his
head, or so they say. Other folks say he might be a witch or wizard,
but that would imply that the old devil at one time even had him a soul to
sell.”

“The five of them–Stolas, Agares, Vassago, Bathin and Labolas–along
with all the other Vice Lords of Noxtown, including a crew of about a
dozen of Stolas’ men–I guess they all had this big meeting at the Shore
Hall in order to carve up their respective territories. It was just my
luck to be there as a bartender, though when I saw who was at this
meeting, I kept as low a profile as I could, as well I might. All this
was long before my fall-out with Stolas, but I didn’t want to be known
too well to any of those particular police characters–because in
their case, the less you know about ’em the healthier you be.”

Before telling me what he learned at the meeting of The Five, Ketman
first delivered forth what he deemed “a protective charm”:

“O Elf, O Fairy, O Pixie, O Nixie, O Demon, find the stone which a
vulture has in his knees and be not an enemy to me. Burn a large frog
to ashes and forgive and forget your wrath. Heliotrope, I collect you in
the sign of the lion and wrap you in a laurel leaf together
with the tooth of a wolf; lay not your curses upon me! Otherwise, may
the power of the cross repel you, airy filth, earthly oaf, fiery foe,
watery woe. Master not this dust but lick the dirt. And may the
Adversary Spirit appear unto you in the form of one of His angels; you
who would fain to be earthly messiah of the demon-kind be herein
foiled. I conjure thee by the living God, that thou shalt flee this
blood and this flesh, like as God the Lord will shun that judge who
judges unjustly, although he might have judged aright!  For I am a
poor servant of my Savior. I know that my redeemer liveth. Redeemer I
call upon Thee: Disconnect, Misdirect,  Mislay, Mislead, Displace,
Dispel all evil lurkers; all fluky flirters; all dusky darters. With
this switch and Christ’s dear blood, I banish your pain and do you
good!”

“Amen!” said Peter Ketman, in a resounding bass rumble which made all the
slurry-voiced barroom loafers turn around and stare. The suds-puller
Tipsy Smith was seen to throw down his filthy rag mop and leave the
bar, though it wasn’t until later that we learned that he had gone straight to Feist’s Cigar Store, to pour word of his doings directly into the ear of Stolas,
his own self.


1*SALUTATION
DARLENE LOVE
A LONG WAY TO BE HAPPY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MpjkbOg2v2k

2*REFERENCE
LANGUAGE DIVERSITY
http://aapivoices.com/slate-youre-doing-it-wrong/

3*HUMOR
Pomeranian Protests His Haircut By Walking on Hind Legs for Two Days
“Thank goodness the dog owner had these little briefs to cover his
dog’s vulgar hog. Can’t have that monster flapping around as the dog
angrily stamps
about the house.”
http://gawker.com/pomeranian-protests-his-haircut-by-walking-on-hind-legs-1576299520

4*NOVELTY
THE NORMAL MAJORITY
FROM ADAM’S RIB CAME WOMEN’S LIB
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=gAeNIvUUMZQ

ALSO SEE:
IN THE KITCHEN
http://youtu.be/NtH_d-uTKI4

5*AVATAR OF THE ZEITGEIST
WALMART IS FALLING APART BEFORE OUR EYES
http://www.fool.com/investing/general/2014/05/17/walmart-is-falling-apart-before-our-eyes.aspx

6* DAILY UTILITY
STEVEN WRIGHT
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/05/01/arts/steven-wrights-offbeat-humor-has-nurtured-other-comics.html?_r=1

7*CARTOON
GOODMAN GOES PLAYBOY
http://www.tomrichmond.com/blog/2010/02/26/starchie-returns/

ALSO SEE:
JUGHEAD’S HAT
http://learning2share.blogspot.com/2009/04/search-term-jugheads-hat.html

8*PRESCRIPTION
LEAST POPULAR AMERICAN BABY NAMES
http://mentalfloss.com/article/53301/least-popular-american-baby-names-according-early-records


9*RUMOR PATROL
CLASSIC AUTHORS WHO SUCK, ACCORDING TO OTHER CLASSIC AUTHORS
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/19/author-insults_n_5326074.html

ALSO SEE:
H.G. WELLS ON HENRY JAMES

“The only living human motives left in the novels of Henry James are a
certain avidity, and an entirely superficial curiosity. Even when
relations are irregular or when sins are hinted at, you feel that
these are merely attitudes taken up, gambits before the game of
attainment and over-perception begins…. His people nose out
suspicions, hint by hint, link by link. Have you ever known living
human beings do that? The thing his novel is about is always there. It
is like a church lit but without a congregation to distract you, with
every light and line  focused on the high altar. And on the altar,
very reverently placed, intensely there, is a dead kitten, an
egg-shell, a bit of string…. Like his ‘Altar of the Dead,’ with
nothing to the dead at all…. For if there was they couldn’t all be
candles and the effect would vanish…. And the elaborate, copious
emptiness of the whole Henry James exploit is only redeemed and made
endurable by the elaborate, copious wit. Upon the desert his selection
has made Henry James erects palatial metaphors…. The chief fun, the
only exercise, in reading Henry James is this clambering over vast
metaphors….

“Having first made sure that he has scarcely anything left to express,
he then sets to work to express it, with an industry, a wealth of
intellectual stuff that dwarfs Newton. He spares no resource in the
telling of his dead inventions. He brings up every device of language
to state and define. Bare verbs he rarely tolerates. He splits his
infinitives and fills them up with adverbial stuffing. He presses the
passing colloquialism  into his service. His vast paragraphs sweat and
struggle; they could not sweat and elbow and struggle more if God
Himself was the processional meaning to which they sought to come. And
all for tales of nothingness…. It is leviathan retrieving pebbles. It
is a magnificent but painful hippopotamus resolved at any cost, even
at the cost of its dignity, upon picking up a pea which has got into a
corner of its den. Most things, it insists, are beyond it, but it can,
at any rate, modestly, and with an artistic singleness of mind, pick
up that pea….”

10* LAGNIAPPE
THE MODERN LOVERS
THE MODERN LOVERS
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujwAUbRa4cs

11* DEVIATIONS FROM THE PREPARED TEXT: A REVIEW OF OTHER MEDIA
40 ALBUMS THAT BABY BOOMERS LOVED THAT MILLENNIALS DON’T KNOW
Aka “40 obscure has-beens RS wants to promote.” Phil Ochs, Laura Nyro,
Butterfield Blues Band, Richard and Linda Thompson, Graham Parker, and
Little Feat all are underrated and deserve to be more widely known.
About six of the others are more than passable. The rest can be found
in the bargain bins of Goodwill Stores across the length and breadth
of this great land.We are begging the question here, but I can name
about a dozen more albums which boomers loved but which have fallen
into obscurity. Steppenwolf’s “Monster” leads the pack, followed by
albums by The Hollies, The Byrds, The Zombies, The Turtles, “There’s
No Hole in My Soul” by Barry Goldberg, and “Maggot Brain” by
Funkadelic. And, if we really want to delve into obscurities, what
about the Seeds, the Leaves, the 13th Floor Elevators, the Gants, the
Merry-Go-Round, and any number of albums which sold better in their
day than currently charting collections but which are now rarities?
http://www.rollingstone.com/music/lists/40-albums-baby-boomers-loved-that-millennials-dont-know-20140514

ALSO SEE:
THE TEN BEST TEXAS PSYCHEDELIC ROCK ALBUMS
http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/dc9/2014/02/psych_rock_texas_best.php?page=all

CONTROVERSIES IN POPULAR CULTURE.
744. WE ARE ALL SUSPECTS
We Are All Suspects: A Guide for People Navigating the Expanded Powers
of Surveillance in the 21st Century
http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:http://radicalreference.info/content/we-are-all-suspects-guide-people-navigating-expanded-powers-surveillance-21st-century

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